Category Archives: The start ’09

Errm…

JasonMraz (WinCE)

God, I really don’t remember the last time I sat on my laptop and typed something other than a pediatrics lecture  or searched up a Wikipedia page on something similar. Anyway, I’m going to try to blog something every now and then, but for now, I want you guys to listen to this amazing song by Jason Mraz, called “Details in the fabric”. It’s a beautiful song and the lyrics are really deep, if you can relate to it then enjoy it :).

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Stairway to heaven

So there’s the way I play stairway to heaven on my guitar

There’s the way Jimmy Page plays it on his guitar

Then there’s this guy : Stanley Jordan 

All I can say is I had my mouth wide open the entire time.

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Reflections of a medical student: Week 1

My first week as a 4th year medical student is almost over and I am sleep-deprived, exhausted, hungry and confused. Everything is new to me now that I started my clinical practice. This first week is basically 25 lectures covering a whole clinical examinations book. The 25 lectures are spaced out over 5 days where each lecture takes a little over an hour. The lectures are given by mean ass surgeons and doctors who basically don’t give a fuck whether we get the information or not. It’s a whole new experience. Not to mention that I’m now forced to dress formally to the hospital, shirt and tie and what not. Basically the reason I haven’t blogged in a week is because I wake up at 6:30 a.m. and shower, then go to school and attend lectures till 4 p.m. I write lecture notes at the speed of 1,000 words a second just to be able to catch up with the idiot who treats us like we’re actually physicians and require us to know every disease in the world. Fourth year is a busy, busy year with a huge amount of stress and responsibility. Not to mention my oh-so-kind-heart that additionally accepted an assistant research position with a few fellow medical students, where we’ve been working for 3 days on a Breast Cancer survey. Running around all over Irbid getting women over 40 to answer a questionnaire that takes almost 30 minutes to complete. I go home every night at almost 10 p.m, once even at 12:30 a.m. So basically, wake up at 6 and sleep at 11 pm with nothing in between but constant running around and cramming my brain with all sorts of physical examinations I’m going to perform on real patients this sunday throughout.

 The good thing though is, that through this hassle, I have little time to reflect on things that once kept me up all night. Sure, I have some free time but I spend it over with the guys to keep my head far, far away. As I write now, I reflect.

I know how much my posts have been depressing lately, and because of that I shall adopt the same thing I do while in class. When one of my depressing subjects come to mind, I just concentrate even more on what I’m doing (listening and taking down notes in that case) and allow my reflections to lie in my pages.

“I dream of a day…”

I wrote a whole lot more than the above quote, which is just the first 5 words of a paragraph I now flip into my yellow pages. I flip it back with my stained sheets, my letters ink-blotted by tears. I flip it back with my heart, my memories. I flip it back…

It’s impossible for me to fake a mood, be someone I’m not or fake a feeling I feel. It’s impossible, be it through my actions, my writings or my face. When I’m sad you can see it, and when I smile at you or make you laugh when I’m pissed off it’s because I flip my yellow pages again, and revisit them when I want to. I am who I am. I’ll never be a character I’m not, live a life I promised never to live, leave my morals or code behind. I flip it all back now…

Don’t be someone you’re not. Don’t live a lie. Don’t pretend that things are okay just to get through the day, because at the end of that day you’re going to end up alone, regretting that phone call you didn’t make, that offer you didn’t take, that message you didn’t relate. Wake up.

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Filed under Life, Personal, Random thoughts, The start '09

Comment by a reader

I got this comment today from a girl who regularly reads my blog and I thought she made some damn good points, along with some totally irrelevant ones :P. Her comment was in reply to a really old post of mine, Let’s just knock off the O, shall we ?. I really liked her reply and I’d like to share it with everyone else who reads my blog. Thank you Zeina for the comment (even though it’s longer than my actual post).

[If you haven’t read this post yet, click on it’s name to read it before you go on reading Zeina’s comment.]

  • Zeina says:

I wanted to comment on this post even before I started reading your blog regularly :P .
To begin with, human body is not perfect nor it’s a bag full of shit and diseases! Israeli occupation to Palestine is solely for the resources but they (the israeli) had pulled a scam upon us and upon their own people! At the end I want to talk about the “fair” life we live, yes my dears it is fair. I shall explain each of these but before I wanna share you 2 jokes that came up to my mind upon reading this discussion.
Once a guy was drowning and yelling for help! A fishing boat came by, the fishermen wanted to help him. He refused, saying that he believed in God, and God will help him. Then a yacht passed by, people on the yacht wanted to help him, he refused repeating the same words… Then the man died and went up to heaven. There, he asked God: “I believed in you, why u left me when I needed you the most.” God replied: “I sent you a fishing boat for help, you refused! A yacht, you refused! Were you waiting me to get into my swimsuit and dive?!

Another guy bought a special car that no matter what u crashed in, it’ll automatically return as good as new, without a tiny scratch. That man wanted to test the car. He smashed the front glass, then a sound said: Ayatoha al sayyara erje3i kama konti! And it did. He crashed into lots of things, and every time the car returned new. Then he ran over a cliff, to test the car! Then the sound said: Ya ayatoha al nafs al motma2enna erji3i ela rabboki radiyatan mardeyya! *no offence to Quraan*

Our bodies are designed to fight diseases, and fix abnormalities! Every cell, every tissue and every organ has its own repair system and a feedback system! These repair systems are able to fix cancer (in early stages) and get rid of other abnormalities. The toxic materials accumulating in the environment due to the industrial and chemical development “DONE BY HUMAN” weakens the body’s ability to fight. Those toxins exhaust our immunity system and thus exposing the body to further diseases. Our bodies are just like that car. They have a limit for endurance beyond which they collapse. As for the anatomy of our bodies well it was engineered for our best usage and there is some wisdom after each tiny detail. For example the woman’s (pubic arch) hips bones are wider than the those for the man so the baby can get through easily upon delivery. I can give many examples but then my comment will be very very long, and shadi would kill me :P .

As for the Israeli occupation! Those abused their religion just as Christians and Muslims, unfortunately. Jews from all around Europe came to Palestine after WWII. Some smart jews saw that the land of Lebanon, Palestine, Syria, Jordan and Iraq is a very vivid area with plenty of resources! They planned a scam to occupy this land. Starting to immigrate in low numbers to Palestine before WWII, living there understanding the whole community. Then upon WWII Jews were commanded to immigrate to Palestine. Most of them were reluctant to leave their lives, houses, jobs and all their memories to live between “Arabs”. So Jews in accordance with the Nazis created the holocaust to scare the hell out of the European Jews, thus they have no other option but to migrate east (this is documented). For clarification not the Christians in USA who are aiding Israel. As a matter of fact most of the persons having the top positions in the American government are Jews.
But It’s a shame really that people highly educated and free thinkers such as ourselves and our peers can still believe that human’s war is for the sake of God. To believe in that, is just ridiculous. Religion – for me- can be divided into 2 parts. One that dictates how to deal with others, and that is the same in all religions. The other part is how do I show respect, appreciation, gratitude and love to God. That no one has to do with, and no one can dictate how I should show God my appreciation. Mostly cause I trust no man of God, I believe no tale but the holy books. The holy books can be understood differently since every word can hold many meanings! Then how can I trust a man of God who knows nothing about arabic language, for instant, to explain Quraan?!
God do exist, God is fair and God is good!
How life is fair? God made life fair but not similar, that is life is complementary not identical. Let’s take the distribution of resources in the world for an example. Gulf area is rich in petroleum and natural gas. Middle East is rich in water. Africa in rich in gold and diamonds. No land has it all, no nation has is all. This would make it necessary to interact thus communities would be built. As for famine in Africa well, God has nothing to do with that since naturally Africa has lots of resources! Greedy human used the undeveloped, uneducated people in Africa to get rich, to get his needs fulfilled. And he can’t care less if little kids got eaten by birds! God did help, God made that fact known for all people around the world, so many NGOs worked to help those who suffer there. But again that greedy human can’t tolerate the loss of his non-ending gold fountain so he aborted as many operations for those NGOs as he could. Not to mention that many of those operations are just a cover for weapon trading and diamond smuggling. Then by other words God had managed to make the sky in Africa to rain bread, but some people stole it, then use it to blackmail the poor people.
You say the fortunate and the unfortunate, the healthy and the handicapped.. to consider the handicapped less fortunate that is vanity! To curse God, life and the rich for your bad luck is pathetic. We live our lives differently, we seek uniqueness and individuality, but we live a fair life in terms of the chances we are given! The lucky is he who is smart enough to seize the chance and work hard. The idiotis he who spends his life whining, cursing his fucking luck and watching the rich with envy. He will only ruin his life and the life of his family! He will be eaten by jealousy and only that is what he’ll leave to his kids.
Get over it people! Life is fair, look for your own chances instead of looking at your friends’ with envy! As you seize your chances listen carefully to God maybe you have to bring some other person’s chance his way! That is why we are all born for a reason, we live our lives, we take decisions, and we meet others for a reason, then all these reasons come together in one point to complete our reason of birth. We fall in love, we laugh, we kiss, we make love, we watch sun rises then goes down, we watch a tree grows, a flower blossoms, butterflies running in an endless journey towards the sun… all for a reason, to learn and to enjoy. They say the devil is in the details, bullshit!! God and only God is in the details, since only there beauty exists.

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Dark chocolate

I don’t know if this is racist, funny, or a little bit of both; I’ll let you guys decide. Here’s something I picked up at the “jam3eye” at my university – Dark chocolate biscuits called “Negro” :

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New found man

As a new found man, I reflect upon the last 3 years of college life and wonder who I was, who I’ve become and who I aspire to be. Once upon a time, I was the nerdy little Choueifat student, who was thrown into the wilderness (Jordan University of Science and Technology), literally :P. I was shoved into a world were I knew no one, and it was tough. Over the past 3 years I’ve gained a lot, lost a lot, but what really matters is still here, myself. My heart, my passion, my goal, my love and my mind are the things that have not changed.

I don’t mean that everything else has changed, but my character has been altered to a certain extent. Let’s call it adaptation. Living in Jordan is far more difficult than living in Dubai. College life is tougher than high school. Living alone is by far the hardest shift. All three changes to my life that have sculptured a rather better man than I used to be. My basic characteristics of being an ass are still there, but I’ve learnt more in the past 3 years than my whole 17 years in Dubai. Come to think of it, I’ve learnt more in the past month than I’ve ever learnt before. I am no longer the hot-headed ass I used to be and I’ve learnt to become more responsible. The reason is largely attributed to a personal experience that I’d rather not share here, but most of you who read my blog have an idea what I am referring to. Other than that, I have been coordinating a diabetes campaign run by my university’s hospital, so I’m busy almost 23 hours a day. I’ve been working my ass off trying to show my superiors that I am a dependable leader, and it’s been going great. I’ve gotten compliments off the wazo, and I feel more mature than ever before! I’m also doing a lot of volunteer work, especially with children. Operation Smile being one of them and the Dubai Autism Center hopefully after my summer course. Working and helping the less fortunate has really had an effect on my character, and I feel like a new man already. I’m also still playing the guitar in my spare time.

The idea of this post is just self-motivation. I’ve been so down lately, some days I just sit on the floor and stare at my wall for hours. Hopefully every other post after this one will be optimistic and more motivating. I’ll post the brochure I’ve been working on for the diabetes campaign, cause that’s one of my short-term goals and it’ll be a huge boost to post up a finished copy. I’ll also keep you guys updated on Operation Smile and maybe everyone who reads this can come over to Jara this weekend and help out by buying something at our booth :).

Till further accomplishments, ta da.

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This is the amazing gift I got

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