Category Archives: Yameen-Shmal

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5hadz has finally gotten rid of that hideous plain theme and decided to go with this new one. Unlike the monotonous two or three column blog layout everybody is usually used to, I decided (mind you it was purely incidental that I found this theme, but none-the-less) to make things a little more interesting. Each box has a picture depicting the main idea of the post and when you place your mouse over the picture, you get a whiff of what the post is going to talk about.

Things that are different are the new “About” page that I always seemed to be missing and the “Links” page that I never had. I’m going to trackback to everyone that’s on my Links page, so if you’ve been tagged I’d love to hear your opinion on my new theme and pages. I don’t mind both positive and negative comments, I know my links are going to upset a certain number of people…but ahh, all in the name of good humor I say.

Hope you guys like my new theme and hope to hear some positive things!

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Filed under Links, Yameen-Shmal

A letter to God

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Dear God,

I know everyone says that you made us all equal, but is that really true ? When I think about the 6+ billion people in this world, I see that the truth is far from that. Why is it that I live a life of comfort, where I share my ideas on a macintosh, whereas an “equal” human being in Africa gets bloated due to starvation and dies a few years after his birth ? Why am I able to eat excessively and throw the rest of my food away while that starving kid doesn’t know that food past stale bread and contaminated water exists ? Why ?

You all speak of equality among humans and yet none of you can prove it. We are not equals, we were never meant to be. Even amongst ourselves, in our own developed countries not suffering pandemics, we are not equals. We are born into our families, our religions, our socioeconomic status and our lives out of pure luck. Not equal, not fair, not anything close to either of those.

For the past 2 months I’ve been in the gloomiest of moods. I have barely left the comfort of my house and sometimes even barely showered more than once a week. Why I am writing a letter to God, you may ask, is because I want to ask Him if things are going to be okay ? I want Him to show me a sign that even though we are not all born into comfortable habitats that we will all be “equal” at one point in time. Maybe when we go up to Heaven and are evaluated for our life. That’s still not fair ! If I was born into a habitat where I was forced to steal to stay alive, or kill another being to survive, then how does that make me look on my evaluation chart ? Not so good, no ? Again, more signals that show me we are not equal.

The real reason I am writing this letter, other than complaining if things are fair, is to seek myself. I’m lost in a world of depression, anxiety, constant stress and it’s getting worse by the day. Two people, tops, are going to respond to this email telling me to ” Cheer up” or ” It’ll pass”, and yeah, if you’re going to do that then please save your bandwith for a youtube comment.

When are we supposed to just give up ? Are we ever supposed to give up ? I’ve been known to go half way on many things in my life but those are things that I like for a few days and then stop liking. Example, learning Spanish or Graffiti painting. I never thought that I’d be at a point in my life where I would start doubting my career. My future I drew out as a very solid plan : become a great doctor, marry the girl you love and then live in Amman and take the wife out for dinner every other weekend. Never in my life would I have seen this day come where I would not give half a fuck about accomplishing the first obligation to my future : become a great doctor.

I have an exam that I’ve barely studied for and here I am writing a letter to God asking him to show me 1 small sign that’ll boost my morale and make me go study ! Why ? Are we supposed to sometimes fail in order to achieve greatness ? Are we supposed to fall into a ditch in order to learn how to climb out of one ? Can’t we just be aware of all the ditches and jump over them ? Why am I so afraid of failing at something ? I’ve lived my whole life either being looked up to, envied or pressured into being the best at everything I did. When I first came to college until now, even though I don’t achieve the best marks, I’m still always the guy labelled as the “nerd” or the “smart one”, and recently all I’ve been seeing myself as is a failure. I’ve failed to be the best, and it kills me.

Tears on both cheeks, I still ask God, why ? Why is it that I sit here at 12:07 AM on a Friday morning and not give a fuck about anything ? Why ?

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Filed under Jordan, Music, Personal, Shmal, Song of the week, Yameen-Shmal

Have we gone INSANE!

What is going on with us???  The world is coming to an end. Nothing right is going on. Only shit is happening. People are losing their minds.


اربد – اشرف الغزاوي – اقدم شاب في اربد عصر الخميس على شطب وجه طالبة جامعية بواسطة اداة حادة موس في منطقة مجمع الشيخ خليل شرق المحافظة
ووفقا لمصادر امنية فقد تحركت الاجهزة الامنية على الفور الى مكان الحادثة لدى ابلاغها بالحادث من قبل المتواجدين حيث تم القاء القبض على الجاني في غضون ساعتين من ارتكابه لجرمه
واشارت المصادر الى انه تم توقيف الجاني والتحقيق معه متواصل لمعرفة دوافع فعلته، فيما تبين بانه من اصحاب السوابق
وتم اسعاف الفتاة الى مستشفى الاميرة بسمة التعليمي ، حيث بين مدير المستشفى الدكتور اكرم خصاونة بان الفتاة – 20 عاما – حضرت الى قسم الاسعاف والطوارئ بحالة نزف في منطقة الوجه جراء الضرب بالة حادة فيما تم ايقاف النزف من قبل الكادر الطبي وتمت مغادرتها المستشفى بحالة صحية جيدة

وفي التفاصيل فقد تفاجأت الطالبة (ر.ح) بالمعتدي الذي غافلها مقدما على تنفيذ إجرامه الوحشي بحقها وعاجلها بضربة على وجهها، حيث كانت في هذه الأثناء خارج الحرم الجامعي، ويعود السبب في الإعتداء كما أفاد بذلك المصدر الأمني بأنها رفضت تلبية ندائه عندما نادى عليها في الشارع العام.

وعلى الفور جرى إسعاف الطالبة من قبل الطلاب المتواجدين في المكان إلى مستشفى الأميرة بسمة ولا زالت هناك لتلقي العلاج اللازم وقطع نزيف الدم الحاصل، حيث أن الجرح الذي أحدثه المعتدي في وجهها يزيد عن 10 سم.

On another note:

– أنس قطاطشة – نجحت  اجهزة الامن العام والدفاع المدني في انقاذ فتاة بالعشرينات من عمرها حاولت الانتحار عصر يوم الجمعة في بأن كانت سترمي  بنفسها من الطابق العاشر لبناية تحت الانشاء في منطقة دوار الداخلية بالقرب من فندق الريجنسي حيث تجمهر اكثر من 6000 مواطن في المكان

وألقت الفتاة رسالة تحدد فيها مطالبها وقد تسلمها رجال الامن الذين واصلوا التفاوض معها ونشروا “فرشات مملوءة بالهواء” اسفل العمارة على سبيل الاحتياط لتلقي الفتاة فيما لو قررت القفز.
وكانت الفتاة  اتصلت بالتلفزيون الاردني وطلبت ان يتابعوا العملية ويقوموا بتصوير المشهد ما جعلهم يتصلون برجال الامن الذي سارعوا الى المكان وواصلوا جهودهم حتى نجحوا في السيطرة على الموقف والامساك بالفتاة وانقاذها.

وقد صرح أحد رجال الامن لمندوبنا أن الفتاة قد طلبت الحديث مع أي من المسؤوولين وان يكون برتبة وزير على الاقل لسماع مطالبها .
وبحسب مراسلنا فان التواجد الكثيف للمواطنين قد اعاق حركة المرور مما ادى الى اغلاق بعض الشوارع المؤدية الى دوار الداخلية
 وفي تصريح للناطق الرسمي في الامن العام  الرائد محمد الخطيب  لزاد الاردن افاد ان سبب محاولة الانتحار هو عدم رضى اهل الفتاة تزويجها ممن تحب وقد تم نقل الفتاة الى المستشفى حيث أغشي على الفتاة حال انزالها عن سطح البناية
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Check a video and pictures on jordanzad here. [FYI, you only see him saving the girl near the end of the video, so watch it till the end].

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Filed under Jordan, Life, Yameen, Yameen-Shmal, YouTube

Ibrahim Baggili : A promising talent

A couple of weeks back we got an email from a guy called Ibrahim Baggili complimenting our blog and asking me if we could feature his video on it, so we decided to dedicate a whole post to Ibrahim and his lovely video. Before we actually feature the video, here’s a little on Ibrahim, a promising Jordanian talent 🙂 :

Ibrahim is a Jordanian currently living in the USA completing his PhD in Cyber Forensics (Sounds cool, no ? Find out more about what Ibrahim is studying here).  He has loved music since childhood and has made many songs starting off with parody and comedic type songs and he ended up pursuing music on a more serious level the past couple of years. Although Jordanian, he only stayed here for 3 years, since he spent most of his lifetime in Abu Dhabi, but that didn’t stop him from connecting to his original roots with the help of his Salti father, who instilled the “Jordanianness” in him.

Ibrahim’s video was directed and produced by his sister – Mouna Moussa – a Jordanian actor (no it’s not actress, it’s actor! ) who also stars in the video alongside Ibrahim. The video is supposed to break the mold of what songs about Jordan entail and Ibrahim portrayed, in a subtle comedic manner, a simple love story for his beloved country, Jordan :). It has been shown on TV on “Seven Stars” and I hope we can get his video out to a greater audience because we believe it’s an extremely nice song that truly shows the feeling of missing one’s home. Ibrahim really captured his love for Jordan and both the music and lyrics are lovely :).

If you enjoyed this song, please visit Ibrahim Baggili here, and enjoy more of his great work. I hope that everyone who liked this video support Ibrahim, he sounds really promising.

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Filed under Jordan, Music, Shmal, Yameen-Shmal, YouTube

Happy Birthday to Yameen :)

It’s April the 7th and I’m back to blogging after a rough 2 weeks of non-stop studying. (Okay fine not non-stop but I was THIS close to developing an aneurism) Top news for tonight doesn’t revolve around my exam because I offically hate my university, and my exam sucked.

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The TOP news for tonight is that it’s Yameen’s BIRTHDAY! 😀 Yes,  she has turned 20!  I want at least 20 comments on this post with 20 (different, for those who want to get smart) people wishing her the best birthday ever! She’s frustrated (as you saw with the post before this), again because of the same stupid fucking university we go to! Happy Birthday Yameen 🙂 hope you have the greatest day ever!

P.S. Any gifts will be expected to be sent in cash to my PayPal account, email me for details. (haha! :P)

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Filed under Personal, Shmal, Yameen-Shmal

The Jordanian Taxi Ride : A world of it's own.

I was talking to my friend Abdullah the other day and we started reminiscing his times in Jordan and what he misses the most.  The all too familiar memory of the Jordanian cab driver was on the top of his list and we laughed our asses off for a long time. Most of us who reside in Jordan have heard plenty of stories from “7amoodeh : sayeg el taxi” :P, and they just never get old. It’s like they have this secret “3ar6a” union where they constantly update the old “3ar6a6” and keep the really popular ones.

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I’m going to share some of the many points me and Abdullah talked about :

  • Every taxi driver in Jordan is educated, sexy and is either an engineer or holds an M.D.
  • The first point we discussed was the level of education he holds and how street smart (7ideg) he is, la2eno kol sayeg taxi bil ordon a7dag min el tani, ow kolhom sho3’ol falsafe. For example :
  •                 I’m in the cab with my friend,we both study medicine, and we start discussing today’s lecture on “carcinomas”. The conversation sways back and forth with me and him sharing different opinions on the matter. Suddenly, you hear a voice say “La2, ma atwaqa3 ino heek”. You turn left and right trying to look for that oncologist that accidentally got into the cab with you and it turns out to be our “7ideg” cab driver. I stare at him and ask who he is to share his opinion, and he talks about his five and a half years of studying medicine in Russia, but then “el zoroof” happened, and he dropped out to work on a Mitsubishi.
  •                You’re late for a business meeting and your car suddenly dies. You hurry and take the first cab you can find, get in, and ask him to take you there. You suggest your normal short-cut route of getting there and he speeds off in the opposite direction telling you he has an even shorter way (so apparently a short-cut to a short-cut). You get to the meeting, later than you would have gotten there if you had walked. Bas bidal 7ideg, he knows all the short-cuts, it just wasn’t his day.
  •                 7amoodeh sees a police car wizz by and he swears at the police. You go “lah ya zalameh, 6awel balak”. He begins to tell you the story of when the police tried to chase him and he got away thanks to his superb driving skills and knowledge of the roads. To make it a little more believable, he tells you that he got caught eventually and was issued a ticket.
  • The second issue we talked about was how much of a sex icon he is, and how every girl that gets in his cab wants to have sex with him :
  •                 You’re sitting next to the cab driver, and you’re listening to your iPod. Out of nowhere, he taps you on the knee. You obviously pause your iPod and look over at him, and suddenly he starts talking and says : ” Gabel shway tel3at ma3ay wa7de, agolak,  wa7deh allah men foog be3lam feeha, anoo, o sharafi a7la men Haifa! Galatli 5odni 3ala el ma6ra7 el flani and when we got there she said keef beddak adfa3lak ?! “
  •                 Once you get in the taxi, his phone rings. All you hear from the conversation is : “Allo, aywa, 7ader, inshalla”. He then looks over at you and laughs then says : “Bedha iyani amor 3aleeha ow ashmot**”.  Tab3an it’s probably his mom asking him to pick up bread before he gets home
  • The third thing we talked about was the engineering degree he holds :
  •                The all too familiar phrase : “aa5 aa5, wallah hay el dinya ishi be5arri”. You’re curious as to what’s bothering him (not really you just want to hear something really funny), so you ask him what’s wrong ? He starts off : ” Elli janbak (referring to himself) mohandes 6ayaran men almania, bas el zaman, aaaaa5 men el zaman, ma 3alina, la wein 3ammi ? “
  •                He asks : “  Sho btodross 3ammi? ” You say medicine and he replies: ” ah walla el 6ibb 7ilo, ana mohandess 6ayaran men almania bas ba7ib ashta3’il 3al taxi “.

This conversation started a few days ago and ever since then me and him have just been sharing stories and laughing for days on end. Today after having lunch with the missus, I was going home with this fairly old looking cab driver. On one of the turns, another taxi driver got too close to his car and he yelled out : “Son of a bitch! Fuck you ya!”. I didn’t pay attention cause I had my piercing on and I thought the guy was just trying to tease me by talking english. A few seconds later he looks at me and says : “3ammi nobody in Jordan know how to drive, you should see blad bara keef el swaga.” I nodded in approval and turned myself towards him a little, knowing I’d love the upcoming things to leave his mouth. He then tells me : “Ana konet 3ayesh bi Texas”. I reply asking him what part of Texas and he immediately replies “Houston.” So far so good, up until he starts with his life story. I asked him why he came back here, and as usual, he replied “el zoroof 5al, sho bedak itsawi”. I thought that was it, cause usually it doesn’t go past that. He continued on by ranting : “Ya zalameh I loved her ow a5lastelha aktar min Romeo to Juliet! Aktar min Kais la Lulwa, gasdi Layla. Ya man I loved her and gave her everything. I studied Business Administration at the university of Houston and she studied Law. I met her there, she was my lawyer man, and she fucked me over!” As he said that last sentence I had arrived home, and after paying him left saying “Better luck next time”.

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Please share your stories, I know everyone of you has at least 1 good Taxi story :D, do share.

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Filed under Funny, Jordan, Life, Shmal, Yameen-Shmal

*Squeeze me* – Another one :)

Hahahahahahahaha! I can’t stop laughing. These guys just make my day. Here’s the new Sprite commercial :). ENJOY !

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Filed under Funny, Shmal, Yameen-Shmal, YouTube